After Irma

Irma came through Orlando in the early hours of Monday morning. I sat in my living room for a time, watching her winds reshape the trees outside and marveled at it all. It was quite a sight to behold and a humbling reminder that storms have a way of adjusting our course. We didn’t receive anything close to the worst of her impact here and still, the damage and debris created in her wake were astounding. It has been a week for survival while seeking to get life back online in the most basic of senses. 

Gratitude has filled my heart as many of us in Central Florida have experienced only minor inconveniences. I’ve been deeply encouraged by those who have served us from near and far—friends and neighbors, linemen and our first responders. But, we’ve all experienced loss nonetheless. Noticing loss and people’s reactions to it this week has been important for me personally. Everyone is processing their experience differently and my compassion has been stirred as I’ve remembered this truth. We’re not a people who are taught to grieve well, after all. We hunker down and then get back to work. This week, much of that work has been sharing resources with friends and neighbors as we all adjust to new, post-storm realities. 

And, while I’ve made several attempts at writing a thoughtful post this week, the truth is that I’m exhausted right now. Instead of forcing myself to capture my many thoughts, I’m choosing to wait and let them simmer a bit. I'll be writing a new series in the coming weeks. We'll talk about the storms of our lives and what it means to weather them well.

For now, I hope you’re safe and feeling cared for today. Whether you’ve experienced Irma or Harvey, are facing wildfires, or dealing with circumstances in your life that feel like one of these storms, you are not alone. You will not always be in survival mode. You can grieve your losses today. And, maybe we all need to take some time to write out what we’ve lost. Engaging in this practice will ensure we do the good work of acknowledging our losses so we can heal. Consider it a good place to start as a way of moving forward...

More soon. xx

Start Small (Thank EVERYONE)

We meet a lot of people along the way as we take our small steps to achieve our big dreams. I've been thinking this week about these people and how this ecosystem matters along the way. Whatever we're building, others are involved whether we recognize their contribution or not. But what if we noticed? What if we noticed to the point of thankfulness? How might it change the landscape of what we're creating? 

A few months back I had a vision for my workspace. I thought a tall, open-design bookcase was required to house my office items and might also create the right aesthetic for the room itself. So when my sister-friend was in town on a visit, we headed out to find a few key items for my space, including the bookcase. Happily, I found one that I loved. When the man at the store offered to help us carry the piece from point A to point B, I was caught up in gratitude for him.

"Sir," said I. "Do you know that you are helping me to create a space where I'll be able to work so much more productively to finish a book I'm writing and build my companies from?"

Proper English aside on my part, he looked up from the place where he was maneuvering the furniture and smiled a little. I don't know that he knew what to say to me, honestly. I'm sure it was a little strange and of course, I continued...

"Seriously, you are playing a part in helping me to do what I'm supposed to do in the world. Thank you so much!" 

Were these my exact words? Probably close, but my memory of the moment gives you the gist. It's true, though. I was so overcome by the reality that his role in this singular offer of help was making it possible for me to better accomplish my purpose. He literally lightened my load, making it easier for me to have what I needed. It was so beautiful to me. Still is.

And just a week or two ago, I opened my door as I saw the UPS man arrive outside. A loud burst came out of me as I greeted him, "Hello there! I'm SO happy you're here!..."

He handed me a large box and I smiled. "Do you know that the thing in this box is going to help me organize all of my things so my companies can move forward??" (I'm very descriptive about the things, you know? I've got some work to do...)

He smiled a little, much like the other man, not sure what to say or do.

"I'm so grateful for you! You're helping me to accomplish all of that..." I exclaimed.

We wished one another well and then he was on his way. (And who knows what he thought when he left... I still smile thinking about the possibilities, though). 

But seriously, HOW FUN is that? There are people in our lives each and every day who are contributing to our forward movement and to our successes. But, what does it matter?

The longer I spend working with people and organizations, the more I see the value of gratitude. When we can appreciate the contribution of others, we actually position ourselves to move our objectives forward. I don't know about you, but when others notice how I've helped them or when they offer a specific thank you for work I've done, I'm ready to help more and work harder. This said, if our motive is to thank because we get something out of it, people will see right through it. I think that's important to note here. But, if we're genuine (because we've practiced along the way), we create a culture that is not only productive but healthy. Practicing this "noticing" in our everyday encounters will translate into a lifestyle of the same.

And who doesn't want to relate to or work with a boss, friend, family member, colleague, or human who shows respect and honor through gratitude? Let's notice our ecosystem! Some contributions may seem small, but we know better. What other people offer to us matters. Let's shower them with gratitude.

So...

• Who has served you today?
• How did their service help you to move forward?
• What might you say to express your gratitude?

I'd love to hear YOUR stories of ecosystem gratitude... Feel free to send a note my way!

A Legacy of Flowers

A friend of mine recently shared how she was asked to consider what gifts each person in her family had offered to her. These gifts had to do with what one generation passed along to the next. I noticed how each of the intangibles she identified felt personally meaningful and our conversation stirred a desire in me to uncover what I have received from my family.

One of my grandmothers was a painter. Oils were her go-to and though I never actually saw her paint, my family still displays several pieces she created. These days I wish I had witnessed her process. She often painted flowers and even as a child, I was amazed by the level of detail in her work. I wonder what it could have been like to show more curiosity and engage her about painting.

Growing up, I didn't feel very celebrated in creativity. And though I participated in choir and theatre, I didn't consider myself an artist in any capacity. I remember taking one fine arts class and feeling like such a failure when the things I'd paint or sculpt turned out terribly. (Truly, they did!) I ended my very feeble pursuit of art after that class.

For me, competence became my pathway to success. I wouldn't invest myself in areas where I saw the potential for a big fat mess outside of my wheelhouse. Because failure was so tied to my identity, I couldn't see how the simple attempt was a beautiful and fruitful endeavor.

A few years ago I was at the end of myself. The way I was living felt hollow. I was very competent in my work life but I wasn't really alive. The story is much longer, but suffice it to say it was time for a change. I had just moved to Florida and one day I had this idea: "What if I painted?" Inspired by a silhouette on a stage I'd noticed during a church gathering, I bought a canvas and some acrylic paints and sat in my room, door closed, trying to paint what I saw. Let's just say it was an interesting rendition. 

What I discovered in that place, however, was the freedom to laugh at myself and try. It felt great. I knew I might never become an amazing painter, but I found pieces of hope in those strokes. As I continued, I discovered I really loved painting two things: abstracts and funny enough, flowers. I regularly gave myself a hard time about the flowers, finding it a bit childish for some reason. I suppose it just seemed like, "Everyone can paint flowers..." It didn't seem challenging or special.

In the years since that time, I've mostly explored with acrylic and I've gotten better. Recently, a friend suggested I try watercolors because of the enormous (understatement) amount of paint I use when creating a new piece. (I really get out of hand! Ha!) And the photo I use today is a recent attempt. I actually like it.

As I painted this piece last night, I thought about my grandmother and her legacy of flowers. Our styles are completely different and her flowers don't look like this one, yet seeing it come to life is incredibly special for me. I realized she gave me something without ever telling me about it and without my ever asking about it. She passed along an appreciation for beauty and process through painting. This gift of hers has become such a sweet place of connection, reflection and growth for me--a tremendous legacy indeed. 

I wonder today: What gifts have your people passed along to you?