Releasing Control

Years ago when I moved to Orlando, I thought I was here for a short 10-month stint.  I vividly remember an invitation that was extended to me that season which was simply:  Would I choose to “do life differently” during the upcoming months?  The stage was set to help me succeed, complete with a simplified work schedule, a pre-furnished apartment, a Disney pass (that was quite a fun perk), and a built-in mentorship program.

I remember making an additional adjustment to really express my buy-in to “differently” … namely, I decided I wouldn't sort and organize the silverware by type when I loaded the dishwasher for the full 10-months I was in Orlando, (nor would I reorganize it if someone else didn't sort or organize it).  It might sound silly, but I recognized how releasing even a bit more control in a season already brimming with change could be good for me as a human being.  For so long, I grasped for control in chaos, stability in the face of uncertainty, and I knew what I really needed was to release even more control to make it to the other side of what I was facing for real.

 I shared my decision with my peers in the program (they gave me the mic that day expecting me to say something - ha).  Many laughed.  My roommates at the time felt horrified (like, “how can we measure up to her standards?” since I had plans for things like how silverware is loaded in a dishwasher).  We recovered.  Still others came up to me and loved the idea and implemented it in their lives that year (it is a great system in case you wondered – I hate unloading silverware to this day and it makes it bearable for me).  

 Overall, it was a great decision.  I didn't know how much I needed to do that little piece of my life differently.  It mattered.  It created an opening for consideration and reflection and change around “why do I do what I do?” … 

 It's important to say that not everything has to be that deep but sometimes it is.  Transition has this amazing way of decluttering the noise in our lives so we can see what we're doing and why we're doing it.  Then sometimes, after we loosen our grip to get a grip on reality and gain some perspective, we might just be able to go back to doing some of the same things but this time, with clean hearts and motives and it somehow becomes even more wonderful than it ever was before.  

 Transition isn't for the faint of heart, though. But maybe the invitation to release even more in the midst of change is the very decision that leads to a better life on the other side.  I've found that to be true.  I'm curious, have you?