Who has your ear these days? What are they saying to you or about you? During Forward Friday this past week, I shared about the regular communications I receive from business coaches who reach out to see how my business is going. They all tend to ask the same, if not the exact same, questions. Some listen to what I share in response and honestly, some don’t. Each time I engage in a conversation like this, I leave with a sense that each person has some idea of what they think success would be for me. Sure, they’re asking about my goals for the next six months, but it always feels tied to an outcome they’re pursuing.

In the midst of considering my engagement with these folks, the start of the New Year, and all that has transpired in the last year, I’ve been asking this question: What now? My thoughts have turned to what success means to me for the season ahead. While these coaches tend to focus on numbers of followers and dollars, I’m actually thinking much, much more about who I’m becoming, how I’m growing, and how the process of innovation, creativity, and personal work I’m living in at the moment is leading me somewhere. I’m genuinely hopeful about that somewhere because I know I’m preparing well to live there right now and I know I’ll be able to help those I work with so much better because of my focus right now.

Trust me when I say that I get why people in our lives, or professionals like these business coaches reaching out to me, are really just trying to be helpful when it comes to our success. I honor their initiative and the reality that they, too, are running a business that requires clients to keep the proverbial (and actual) lights on. But if you and I don’t know what success means to us, we can easily get carried away into something we were never intended to engage (like making X amount of money because somehow that proves to us that we’re a success).

For me, connection and consistency are high values. I don’t need to coach a ton of people or bring in massive dollars to succeed at connection and consistency. More money or more followers doesn’t necessarily measure the kind of impact I’m going after. Numbers tell an important story and we have good reason to be attuned to reality there. But if I’m basing my idea of success on numbers, what happens when they’re not adding up the “right” ways? What does that mean to me? What does that say about me? Who will I be if they’re not what I think they should be? Do I “hustle” until they are? To what end?

Not too long ago, I received a referral from a client I only saw a few times. I enjoyed my sessions with the client but hadn’t heard from them since our last meeting. Because of that referral, I learned that my client had experienced a tremendous breakthrough as a result of our sessions. I honestly had no idea. It was a true gift to learn that, though. It brought me joy. I felt successful because I’d helped a client move forward. I didn’t need that client to come back to me for 10 sessions when they got what they needed in a few. I needed to help them and set them loose back into the world with newfound hope and freedom. And it was awesome to know the work they did in session, and out, got them there.

Knowing what success means to us ensures that we stay the course and don’t get sidetracked by other people’s opinions or a standard the world sets out for us to meet. In a society that, as my friend expressed recently, seems to require us to turn all hobbies into money-making endeavors and feels like it makes everything about creating side-hustles to make a buck, what if we turned that perspective on its head simply by knowing who we are and what we’re about. We get to make the contribution we’re meant to make without striving for an outcome that, in the end, might not be right for us. It’s hard to get derailed into someone else’s idea of success when we’re clear on what success is for us.

So when it comes to you being successful in the season to come, I ask: What now? What’s on your mind for who you’re becoming, how you’re investing and helping, and what it looks like to practically live that out in real life? I encourage you to define it. Make goals from there, from that place of understanding and focus. I believe if you and I do this consistently, it will take us deeper and further in this life. And I think we’ll really enjoy our lives.

Keep me posted on your progress. I’d love to know what you uncover as you discover and dream. I’ll keep you posted on my progress, too.